1. An Australian man got bitten on the penis by a spider for the SECOND TIME. The same man. On his same penis.
Image: BBC
2. Some Russian dude took a shit right in the middle of a supermarket. Just dropped his kecks right there and did it.
Image: YouTube
3. And if that wasn't enough, this guy pissed into a supermarket freezer in Stockport.
Image: YouTube
4. This uni lecturer gave literally zero fucks about taking his job seriously.
https://twitter.com/KaySiizzle/status/787740676599537664
5. A little boy found a message in a bottle, but it was just from two blokes off their heads on drugs.
Image: Twitter
6. This girl got pissed and decided to drunk text Gatwick Airport. Not even she knows why.
https://twitter.com/annievicvic/status/780884748205977600?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw
7. This idiot seagull fell into a massive vat of curry and dyed itself orange.
Image: Vale Wildlife Hospital
8. This guy made a really great first impression at his new uni.
https://twitter.com/biebergirl5ever/status/776509580725587973
9. Although this is nowhere near as bad as the bloke who accidentally texted his mum THIS on a night out.
10. We found out that Noel Gallagher is possibly the greatest troll of all time.
https://twitter.com/UweBollocks/status/791478240288317440
11. Someone discovered these extremely genuine Ralph Lauren polos.
https://twitter.com/TheBuie/status/783710920572821505
12. Princess Beatrice accidentally sliced open Ed Sheeran's face while trying to fake-knight James Blunt. Yeah. I know.
13. A duck broke the land speed record.
14. Someone paid for a plane seat for their burger cushion.
https://twitter.com/davidfarrier/status/746032197342232576?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw
15. There was an anti-Trump protest on Club Penguin. Yep, Club Penguin.
https://twitter.com/gossipgriII/status/797931201717673985
16. Remember this man who took a picture with the person who hijacked an EgyptAir flight? Somehow that happened this year.
17. There were loads of crabs on the subway in New York. Just loads and loads of crabs.
https://twitter.com/HelloCVH/status/749645446163955712
18. Some bloke did away with sweets and gave out rotisserie chickens to trick or treaters on Halloween.
https://twitter.com/cosmogyr/status/793398008272523266
19. Someone, somewhere, for some reason, decided to make a life-size LEGO man with human skin.
Image: YouTube
20. This family called a plumber round, and long story short, he absolutely fucked them.
Image: Twitter
21. A total genius pranked their mate by printing out their boarding pass on A1 paper.
22. Northamptonshire Police were on the lookout for this very inconspicuous criminal.
23. This cinema kind of fucked up their display really quite a lot.
https://twitter.com/BasedLaRock/status/768577125594963968
24. A random bloke wore this, a onesie covered in pictures of nothing but close-ups of Bernie Sanders' face.
25. A woman printed out 15 pages worth of Facebook comments and took them on the subway with her to read, like a book.
https://twitter.com/AlexSteinman/status/750820426549436416
26. ASOS kept delivering people ridiculously long pairs of jeans.
https://twitter.com/GeorgeRiggall/status/735868663518072832
27. And a kid went snorkelling in a fountain in Nottingham town centre.
