People are talking about Melania Trump's body double, but what they should really be investigating is Ben Mitchell.
This controversial
EastEnders character first arrived on our screens in 1996. He was cute, loveable and had brown hair. Only one of those attributes that has remained a constant over the past 21 years, and it's his brown hair.
Ben Mitchell is not the same boy today that he was in 1996.
EastEnders is lying to us. This is all a huge cover up and the Government is in on it as well probably.
Behold the evidence. Behold the truth.
Ben Mitchell 1996-1998
Between these years, Ben Mitchell was quiet. He didn't have many lines on the show as he was mostly a background character. He seemed to enjoy being carried around by his parents if and when the script dictated it. Ben was frequently seen playing with toys and also sleeping. He was happy.
After a brush with meningitis, during which time panic ensued because his mother was convinced that Ben's childminder's husband having AIDS could've somehow caused the meningitis, he bounced back pretty quickly despite his mother's stupidity. He was pronounced partially deaf in one ear and moved to South Africa. That is the Ben Mitchell you and I came to know and love. That is the real ben Mitchell. Those that followed have done and continue to do him a disservice. This precious boy is long gone.
Ben Mitchell 1999-2001
This imposter is not Ben Mitchell. His hair is blonde, it's got a bit of a curl in it, his eyebrows are lighter and that innocent look in his eyes has gone. There's no easy way to say this, but I have been sent information from an anonymous source which confirms my suspicions this Ben Mitchell is a body double.
He was brought onto Albert Square at a time when '96-'98 Ben Mitchell was going through a rough patch. The fame had really gotten to him, he was hitting the bottle pretty hard and going a bit too heavy on the Rusks. The producers warned him that if he didn't get his act together, they would replace him. "Bullshit, you can't replace ME", he said. But replace him, they did. No one ever saw the original Ben again.
This new Ben Mitchell kept a low profile.
EastEnders' cameramen used a variety of camera trickery techniques to give the illusion that he was the same person, but true fans could see the difference. The mannerisms were off, this Ben carried himself differently. This new child had more pizzazz about him. He was cheeky. He yearned for mischief. Regardless, few people noticed the difference. It seemed like everything was going well and they'd pulled it off. Until 2006.
Ben Mitchell 2006-2010
Ben had spent eight years in South Africa with his mother Kathy and her new husband Gavin, until they were killed in a car crash and he was forced to return to Albert Square to live with his Dad, Phil. Those eight years treated Ben kindly we assume because he changed his entire body YET AGAIN and was traded in for an older model who apparently needed glasses.
This Ben was abused by his Dad's new girlfriend, Stella, who was a real piece of work. She was a horrible bitch to Ben from the moment they met, eventually culminating in Ben outing Stella on her and Phil's wedding day, where she responded rationally by jumping off a roof and dying instantly. Such hesitation would not have been displayed by the Ben Mitchells we knew previously. This Ben was different. This Ben was weak.
He then became tormented once again, this time by Phil's estranged daughter Louise. She faked a diary entry by Ben confessing that he was gay, so Ben took the completely normal course of action to burn her hand with a hot spoon and hold her hostage for a day. Ben then turned on his friend Jordan and attacked him with spanner to the head, landing him some time in juvenile detention.
Who is this imposter that is ruining the good name of Ben Mitchell? What happened to the sweet and precious angel that used to play with toy cars and comfort himself with the warm embrace of his mother's bosom? That Ben left us a long time ago. This Ben 3.0 was trouble. He was a far cry from Ben Mitchell 1996-1998. Surely people would notice the difference? Alas, we must remember that people are morons.
Ben Mitchell 2010-2011
He spent eight months in juvenile detention and also completely changed his appearance yet again, but now he's back! This new Ben, whose only similarity to the previous Ben is a pair of glasses, is still a very angry and troubled young man. He came back with a bang by punching his Dad and pushing aunt Glenda down a flight of stairs. Would Ben '96-'98 have done that? Would he fuck.
A shopkeeper caught Ben kissing a boxer called Duncan, so Ben took the rational decision to throw a brick through his window. Phil eventually found out and refused to accept Ben's sexuality, so pushed him away. Ben got angry and lied to the police about Stella's death, saying that Phil forced her to jump off that roof, meaning he got arrested but then released when Ben was found out by his half brother Ian. Then Ben killed Heather because he thought she grassed him up even though she didn't. I have a headache. Ben Mitchell 4.0 has given me a headache.
Basically, this Ben is a lunatic on a path of destruction whose only aim is to make life difficult for those around him. He learned nothing during those eight months in juvenile detention, except how to assume the physical identity of someone else. He ended up in prison, but not before accidentally fathering a child while he was testing his sexuality by sleeping with a woman. This isn't Ben Mitchell. This is not how his life was supposed to pan out. Ben Mitchell would never wear a cardigan. He would never conceal his sexuality. Ben Mitchell was supposed to be brave. Folks, we have an imposter for the fourth time.
Ben Mitchell 2014-2017
At this point, you'd be forgiven for thinking that Ben Mitchell is Doctor Who, such is the volume of his regenerations over the past 21 years. We need to face the facts here: 2011 Ben vs 2014 Ben is the worst transition to date. 2011 Ben is pale, freckled and has a problematic hairline. 2014 Ben is tanned, possesses a fine head of hair and even an earring. These are not the same people. None of the above gentlemen are the same person.
In terms of his character, 2014 Ben Mitchell got to be in charge of his Dad's garage, proving that he was a tough and cool manly man, but then he was tricked into signing the garage over to Max, which dented his manliness ever so slightly.
He was in a weird relationship with Abi where they both knew that he was gay, but continued to have a fake romance to keep Phil happy. This is not the Ben Mitchell we've come to know. Scroll up to 1996 Ben Mitchell. Look at that cheeky face. He would never hide his true self to keep those around him happy, he would embrace his inner feelings and flourish.
2017 Ben Mitchell seems to have mellowed out compared to the two Ben Mitchells that have come before him. He's trying to be a better person and has been received a lot better by audiences than his previous counterparts. But that doesn't excuse what they've done.
EastEnders' producers must think we are idiots. We have eyes. We can see that Ben Mitchell is different. A similar pair of glasses is not sufficient. They have different faces, skin tones and body types. What's next? Is 2018 Ben Mitchell going to be two small kids stacked on top of each other wearing a trench coat?
Conclusion
It was announced earlier this month that Ben Mitchell would be departing the show at the end of the year in an 'explosive storyline'. Is this the end of Ben Mitchell or the end of this particular Ben Mitchell? Fuck knows.
The main takeaway from this important piece of journalism is the following:
EastEnders has lied to us every single time Ben Mitchell has returned. It hasn't been Ben Mitchell since 1998. It's been a different person each time. They think we are stupid, but we are not.
Melania Trump has a body double and Ben Mitchell has a body quintuple and that is a fact. Everything is a lie and nothing is sacred. Have a wonderful weekend!
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